Me! I'm that kind of idiot.
Who'd have thought that a database would just blow up like that when all you were doing was removing an email address from one of your scripts?
Me! I'm the kind of person who will think that now.
Fortunately between the bits that I managed to salvage, and a backup that's so old that it was stamped in bronze I have managed to create something that should work well enough to keep everybody happy tomorrow. If they're not screaming at me then they're happy, IMO.
... which reminds me, I should probably back up the new one now or something.